[johnforbes]

"As you may know, our government just passed a very important and necessary omnibus spending bill to make sure all the important government activities remain funded! Whew, what a relief!

We forced an unpaid intern to read all 4,155-page bill and report on some of the most essential programs being funded! Here they are:

$20 Million to teach transgender Argentinian farmers how to use TikTok: So very important. TikTok needs their voice.
$3 million to hire more guards for the ark of the covenant: Rumor has it Epstein's client list is in there.
$18 billion to cover Martha's Vineyard's new immigrant-deflecting dome: It's the compassionate thing to do.
$500 million to figure out what's in the omnibus bill: Our unpaid intern already did it for free so we're not sure why this is needed. We're sure the government knows what it's doing.
$8 billion to groom undocumented immigrant kids: Immigrants should have access to all the same grooming that American kids get in public school!
$12 million to figure out how to make COVID even deadlier: This is very important for science.
$100 billion to study inflation: What even causes it? Hopefully, they find out!
$31 Billion to shoot all the cows: It is Greta Thunberg's wish. So let it be written, so let it be done.
$1 million for research into Greta Thunberg comebacks on Twitter: She only has a meager team of 12 working on this.
$70 billion to figure out why kids love the taste of cinnamon toast crunch: We just LOVE science, don't you?
$2 million to outfit Zelensky with more sweet olive drab sweaters: He looks so dreamy in those.
$1.00 for the claw game in the rotunda: Thomas Massie needs something to do while his staffers are reading omnibus bills.
$100 million for the launch of Jan6+, the all-January-6th cable network: Finally, giving the people what they want!
$1 billion to study the environmental impact of lighting $1 billion on fire: Whatever the impact, we're sure it's totally worth it.
Wow! Thanks for taking care of us, Government! We look forward to seeing what's in next month's spending bill!"

[elklindo69]

Kind of strange how they can find 858 billion dollars to purchase new hardware for the military but there is hardly anything for school lunches and healthcare for children.....I guess it's one of those things.

[johnforbes]

Military fitness standards are being lowered so that the "woke" military can get the personnel it desires for CRT classes.

If your manpower is being divided by Critical Race Theory, don't you then need better toys to do the intimidation your people cannot?

My public school did NOT have breakfast. We had to pay for lunch, and we had to consume that quickly in order to spend time arm-wrestling on the tables.

[elklindo69]

Entrance standards to the military have declined because of the strong economy. Anybody who can get a decent paying civilian job will not go in the military....so then they are left with a bunch of dumb hillbillies. I know, I was there. I've seen those people. I have no idea how they survive in the world..............

[sillydaddy]

Maybe it's time to bring back the draft...

[johnforbes]

Hate to say this, but the draft had some good aspects.

For example, you cannot get a full cross-section of civilian talent in the military without conscription.

My old pal Milt had a Ph.D. in chemistry, and without being drafted he would have gone on to work in some corporation or college instead of entering the Army.

Proponents of an all-volunteer military claim it leads to a higher average IQ in the service. Even so, you need high IQ people to balance out the low IQ people in any organization.

For example, Clowntroller's WAIS score was recently measured at 72. Even though that was a great score for him, Clown's contriibutions to this fine forum have to be balanced out by higher IQ individuals.