[johnforbes]

A new whistleblower is now reporting that Mr. Clown R. Toker knew Karl Marx personally, and that he assisted him in the oval reading room of the British Museum.

My ace journalists have not confirmed this story, but they don't need to even try because modern journalism consists purely of rumor and gossip.

Thus, I recommend a Special Forum Counsel be appointed to spend 2 years investigating whether Clown worked for Karl Marx.